Decision #1

I have decided it is high time to take control of my life again and do something for me. 2014/15, I ran a half marathon in 2 hours and 4 minutes (20 minutes faster than I anticipated for my first time) and I lost 47 lbs. Since that day of the half, I have lost my motivation and dedication of taking care of me. Why? I don't know- could be my schedule changed, I no longer was working a 7-3 job or the fact that losing weight isn't as easy but one thing is certain, I put myself on the back burner. Not anymore. As of Monday night, I signed up to run my biggest race yet. I am running Grandma's Marathon on June 18, 2016. To say I am nervous and excited is a true understatement. My friend Stef came all the way from Pittsburgh this year to do the half with me and she is doing the half again this next summer. I am blessed I have a friend crazy enough to do these kinds of things with because let's face it running crazy distances isn't for everybody. I downloaded an app my friend Emily told me about called My Asics and it is awesome. I ran my first run/jog yesterday in the pre-conditioning part of my training plan. 3 miles in 30:34 - not my fastest but faster than what the plan told me and it felt awesome. So yep I took my measurements and my before pictures. I figured that when the scale isn't being so friendly, maybe measurements will be. The scale isn't the only reflection of success and I know that deep down but I need to instill this in my brain and keep reminding myself I am better than just a number I see. I haven't stepped on the scale yet this week, I am still toying with if I want to continue my WW membership or not. I am so fixated on the number but I love the feedback and knowledge I receive at the meetings. I have until the end of this month since I just paid for another month to decide so we'll see what this month brings. Am I proud of how I look now? no but I am proud I have maintained my loss and continue to exercise. I can climb through the tubes and go down the slides with my 2.5 year old so I am pretty happy about that. The pics are the ones I took the other day. Sorry for the bathroom photos, nobody was home and I was determined to get them done before I forgot or decided against it. My ultimate goal is to honestly like a picture I take and be able to keep up with my kids. Beyond that? it's just an added bonus.

I started making a list of all the reasons I want to run this marathon, I am almost finished so when I do, I will make sure to post. Crazy or not, walk or run- I will cross that finish line next summer. I have always been an all or nothing girl but no matter what, I need to do this. Instead of dreaming and wanting it, I am going to just do it and do the best that I can. So my new goals for 2015/2016... 1) lose the next 50-60 lbs 2) be kind to myself 3) run Grandma's marathon! 4) run at least some sort of race at least every other month (being realistic) 5) have fun and enjoy life 6) find myself again- I am more than just mom, babysitter, friend, auntie... I will add more as time goes on but these are big ones for me. Thanks for following me on my journey, I have enjoyed reading others and always wondered if I should write my thoughts down so when I am having a down or bad day, I can go back and read what I have wrote. Love that I have so many supporters and friends that understand my craziness and goals whether it be finding yourself, running that certain race, hitting a certain goal or just being happy being you. Love, Jaime